These past few weeks have made me very depressed. When my husband and I were sealed, I finally understood why my Dad had been stressing this to me my entire life. She will insist on raising her children in the Mormon church. And I never found that "good Mormon girl". Same boat, if we have plans, he usually ends up. If you have a literal belief that you need to have a temple marriage to go to the celestial kingdom, you will always keep a secret desire to convert your spouse. How am I certain. I let her know it's not healthy to expect someone else to change - we can only control ourselves and not others.
Basically nothing like reality. The ideal, in my opinion, is that she discovers what we all know about the lies the church tells her. You and your husband are truly a team, even though things are not always equal. This means no swearing, loud talking, or making offensive jokes. I think the most important thing is to bring up the issues as questions rather than points as why she's wrong. Now a basic overview of the gospel.
Until you can believe someone else's beliefs are reasonable, you will not be able to treat them with the respect they deserve. Notify me of new comments via email. Once she realizes you won't join and she can't get married in the temple, then I suspect everything will be over.
If she identifies as a Mormon, then she probably takes her faith seriously, and it means a lot to her. You may look on here and see all of us, but a lot of us got out much much older. Ending sooner rather than later is much easier and less painful for everybody. I have been with him through medical school and residency for internal medicine, which was tough, but manageable.